Not what I meant

The very upset lady says to her blonde friend " I hear you're telling everyone that my husband has a mole on his penis," "I didn't say it IS so...
... I said it feels so"

Blonde Deb

Blonde sitting in a bar. Two guys walk in. First guy says to the barman, "Johnny Walker single". The second guy says "Jack Daniels single". The blonde looks at them an say "Deb Steward, divorced".

Warning!!!

Warn all your friends!!

Importance: High

A warning for all men who may be regular Builders Warehouse customers. Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.

Here's how the scam works:

Two very hot girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping into the boot. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and WindoLene with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to KFC. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you, unzips your pants and plays with y

ou while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen November 4th, 9th, 10th, tw

ice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th & 29th. Also December 1st, 4th, twice on the 8th, three times last Saturday and very likely again this upcoming weekend.

So please be careful.

P.S. Mr Price has wallets on sale @ R19.99 each

Knitting

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the
wheel was knitting!

Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren,
the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled ,
"PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"